Idiosyncrasies.

What bonds us to people? Do we love the best qualities in someone or is that just what we're initially attracted to? See, I seem to go for any guy who can hold an in-depth conversation about art, philosophy, literature, or history...but that's not what creates intimacy. And my best friends, well, they're like me for the most part: open-minded, loving, and interesting...but that's not why I miss them every day and at this very moment need to be enveloped in a hug from one of those people who knows how I desperately need and resist such affection in tandem.

No, I think it's vulnerability that is at the heart of human intimacy, because in order to show our flaws we have to allow ourselves to be totally vulnerable to another person, trusting that they will accept us anyway. Attachment is bred from intimacy, and intimacy can only come through the total knowledge of these flaws (Candace pounding diet cokes in bed at 11 pm comes to mind).

But seriously, whether your philosophy is Eastern or Western, Christian or atheist, I think we can agree that loving each other is the most important act we take part in in our little lives-- I think of how I love my sister the most when she tells me I can't move, or text, or breathe too hard when we share a bed (oh, but she can) or how I love Theresa the most when she's being bossy, or Joshy when he complains about the mess I left behind in his apartment (when it is totally spotless), or Magan being TOTALLY wacked out the night before I moved and then holding my hand for 2 hours the next morning, or Lilli...certain that our cat is dying from a new ailment, or Frank just showing up somewhere after I haven't heard from him in 3 weeks or Les...puking in my car while wearing my sweatshirt, then telling me it's my fault (for going 35), or Reid who tells the same stories over and over again--what are you gonna be like when you're 50?

I could go on with my enumeration of idiosyncrasies in the people I love, and I'm sure everyone else could talk about my obsessiveness, laundry list of potential diseases, and need to always be right. about. everything. But my point is this: I miss you all so much, and what I miss is not necessarily everything that makes you amazing people (which you all are). I miss the Good Stuff: the flaws, some of which, maybe only I know about. I miss those things because they are a symbol of our intimacy as people...so it is, afterall, the little things that make life worth living. And perhaps it isn't the flawed  individual that we fall in love with, but it is loving someone because of (and not in spite of) those things, that makes it last forever and ever. amen.

<3, e

snapshots of the market and my future.

 For to listen as you browse: My favorite song or... have you been searching for a heart of gold?

Almost went JeanVal-Jean on these tarts

Yeah, He's Irish. All the good ones are ;)

I don't know how to eat this. But I want to learn.

I have to eat here at night, it has lights hanging everywhere.

Delicious!

Post-Rain abandoned street sunshine :)

And this guy played Neil Young's "Heart of Gold" the whole time! What a perfect song for a perfect morning.

Things I will never say when I'm married* 
"hubby." I hate this word
"hubs." worse
"date night." Just, No.
"We think ____." What, how?

*This is not a stab at those who do say these things...
I just need to vow this publicly so I don't recant.

I'm not good at being negative, so I started a List of things I DO want when I grow up
So far all I have is:

Extensive herb garden
hand-carved wooden bed
A room for piano playing and yoga practice for my sisters to visit
front porch swing (because where else will my old black lady ghost sit, AK?)

Happy Halloween Weekend! <3, e

happy humpday.

What are you happy about today?

Trees between My house and the Canal, Charlemont Street.

 10. Laying awake, all bundled up in bed from 7:30 to 8:30 this morning. Just thinking :)

9. British Chocolate. It's SO much better.

8. The smell of Autumn outside. Is it burning leaves? Chimney smoke? Heaven?

7. Downton Abbey. It's a Masterpiece Theatre program set in WWI era England. 

6. Showing PowerPoint who's boss.

5. The fact that I'm already packed to leave in 8 days--yeah, I'm an early packer, it's one of my things.

4. warm, fresh, delicious smelling Laundry

3. Booking an 18 hour train ride--with 4 hours in the middle spent in DC for breakfast

2. Delta Rae and their awesome feel good music

1. Just stopping on a long walk, breathing deeply, looking around, and realizing that the city I have chosen to live in is so amazingly beautiful in so many ways.

View of the mountains and rooftops on the way to Ranelagh

Wish me luck on my presentation tomorrow! It's on Issues in Environmental Archaeology in Prehistory like Neolithic woodland management, Iron Age farming + climate change, and technological advancements in pollen analysis. Reid says if you need help falling asleep, it would be a good read!

"Maybe It's All We've Got, But You're All I Need"

So the grind is on, which is why I'm blogging less. In 12.5 days I leave for AMERICA! But between now and then I have a HUGE fieldwork submission on Tuesday, a presentation on Thursday, a portfolio the NEXT week, and a 1500 word reflection on my presentation. Though I have another presentation, a 3000 word essay, and a 7500 word paper due when I get back in November, my time in the US will be a much needed period of joy and rejuvenation.  Candace and I are so happy here in Ireland-- we've each made a few friends at school, and stay busy with school and work, but spend most of our down time together. I'm so glad to have her back, things were getting quite lonely for the week she was gone! Mat Kearney aptly puts the feeling into words in the song quoted in the title of this entry.

Today, Candace and I are keeping warm and cozy inside our apartment, making sweet potato gnocchi. (In truth, I'm crunching away at numbers for my fieldwork submission, playing DJ, and taking pictures of Candace while she cooks for me). Of everything we've made this fall, this is the recipe to try! When Liz "Jelly" Wills made this for me in her Mouse House in Eastern market last year, I felt like crying it was so delicious. Enjoy! And please send a picture that I can post if you end up trying this delicious recipe :)

Sweet Potato Gnocchi with Butter Sage Sauce

2 lbs. red skinned sweet potato

12 oz. container ricotta cheese, drained

1 cup grated parmesan cheese

2 Tablespoons golden brown sugar

2 tablesspoons + 2 teasoons salt

1/4 teaspoon nutmeg 

2 3/4 cups all purpose flour

2 sticks butter

6 tablespoons chopped fresh sage 

1. Microwave Sweet potatoes on high until tender, cut in half and cool.
2. Scrape sweet potato flesh into a bowl and mash
3. Add Ricotta cheese, blend well
4. Add parmesan, nutmeg, brown sugar, 2 teaspoons salt and mash to blend
5. Mix in flour half cup at a time until dough forms.

Steps 6-9

6. Turn dough onto floured surface and divide into 6 equal balls
7. form each piece into a 20 inch long rope by rolling out with hands (sprinkle with flour if it get's sticky!
8. Cut each rope into 20 pieces
9. Roll each piece over tines of fork to score/indent and transfer to baking sheet

10. Bring a large pot of water to boil, add 2 tablespoons salt
11. Boil gnocchi in batches for 5-6 minutes, transfer back to baking sheet and let cool
12. Preheat oven to 300

13. Melt butter in a large saucepan, cook until it is brown with a toasty aroma, swirling pan occasionally! (This should take about 5 minutes on medium-high)
14. Add chopped sage and season generously with salt and pepper, turning off heat.

Steps 13 +14

15. Now add your gnocchi and sage to a skillet to saute until the gnocchi are heated through (about 6 minutes), Do this in batches and place in oven to keep warm while completing all batches!

Enjoy this delicious Autumn meal!!


Also, this obsession as of late:
I love him for the man he wants to be, and I love him for the man he ALMOST is. I love him Laurel. I. Love. Him.

Don't Wanna Miss A Thing

It's Wednesday, so it's time for a list of things that made me Happy Today!

10. Team CandLiggle is back in action AND in Carolina Blue Fall wardrobe!! (see below)

9. Being Betty to Candace's Don Draper and baking pie while she's at school

8. PRODUCTIVITY. I finished my field work portfolio, planned my presentation, 

did P90x with Tony, cleaned, and made homemade pie crust all before noon.

7. The lavender candle Candace brought home

6. Finished a good book. 

5. My skype date tonight! (That I accidentally slept through last night) <3

4. Beautiful cherry tomatoes that I eat like candy

3. Sweater(dress) weather. The one I'm wearing today, I bought for $8 at a 

thrift store in NoDa 5 years ago

2. Email from Pauly's Mum today telling me the best way to get to 

London to spend the Holidays with the North Family this year. 

*No family (other than my own) I'd rather be with on Christmas*

1. Rereading the letter I got from Helen (who has known me for 23 years)

"When you feel like you're far away in your foggy corner of the world, read your letters again and remind yourself that the love from family and friends is the best sweater in the world....imagine your adventures in archeology, the exciting realization that you're living out what a younger self so hopefully prophesied..."

Pumpkin Pie with maple leaf for dessert. Candace brought home whipped cream!

Lizzie locked out with Starbucks

delicious and nutritious lunch today

Candace and her school love

Happy List Wednesday! (I almost forgot)

So much to be thankful for today....What makes you happy? Join the postcard club like Sweet Sam Spaeth did when she named 2 allusions from Monday's post! Send Happy Lists my way! L.elisabethlewis@gmail.com

10 Reasons I'm Happy on 10/12

10. My Mama is here :) + I get to watch her stop in the middle of streets and take touristy pictures 

9. My Mom brought my P90X! Tony is back for me....with a vengeance! Yoga tomorrow!

8. Clean Bill of FREE women's healthcare today at the Doctor! Point Europe. 

7. The beautiful invitation I got today to my oldest friend Caitlin's wedding (21 years!) Point USA

6. My favorite Specialty food store finally got in "CANNED PUMPKIN, pumkin!"

5. Rose flavored dark chocolate to go with my French Press Coffee (Thanks Mom!)

4. Encouraging messages on telephone booths (Sorry. It DID make me happy)

3. Packing for London! Because I do everything 2 days in advance. You DON'T want to see the exhaustive itinerary I made of historical places to visit.

2. Yellow Flowers. because to know me is to love me, and to love me is to send me flowers. 

Flowers are a girl's best friend. Diamonds are just decoration.

1. Moules, Moules, Moules!

The only food my homesick little tummy could possibly crave: Mussels.

Bad language, Good message.

*If you were wondering that IS Jacque-Louis' coronation of Napoleon, my passport, and my letter from Veronica underneath the wedding invitation :)

Love + Digging up the Past

I don't want to do this right now, but I feel like I have to. I'm compelled. This is what composers and [real] playwrights must feel like. I've become some deranged Carrie Bradshaw or something--except for the cigarettes and the friends and the sex-- so I'm a poor man's Carrie Bradshaw, just talking into my computer and asking no one rhetorical questions about love and relationships as I gaze out my apartment window in a quirky outfit.The truth is, I was quite enjoying my article on spacial representation in Iron Age houses on the Orkney Islands. Did you know 80% of them have a Northwest/Southeast axis? I smell a cosmology reveal coming....
Anyway, "Today I got to thinking about relationship baggage," that is... all we carry with us from the past into the present. Reasons are two-fold:
Reason 1:  I'm reading The Path to Love* by Deepak Chopra. I bought it off an old lady for 2 euro, and if you know me, you know I scrounge for spiritual guidance lit like an addict. It's sort of embarrassing to read this sort of thing, I know. When I was eating lunch at school on Friday, I hid the cover from my German friend, Indra, because I figured her uber-rational people wouldn't get my people [Carrborites = earthy, yoga-practicing, spiritual enlightenment seekers]. Anyway, I burned through this 350 page book in a week. I'm pretty sure Deepak is the only person I could actually be in a relationship with. He just gets my desperate need for control and acceptance, which I appreciate.
He harps on two major points, the first being that love isn't earned, it just is, and we all deserve it, so our constant desire to be smart enough or beautiful enough or successful enough to attract a certain person is null because it's our birthright to experience the most complete love this planet has to offer:  Romantic Partnership! The only relationship that can bring us to spiritual ecstasy. The second thing Deepak really focuses on is fear. 1 John 4:18 tells us that "There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts our fear." Deepak tells us this too. While I think John was reminding us that Jesus's death took away the need to be fearful in order to properly worship, Deepak cautions us about bringing old fears into new relationships. He continues explaining that our universal desperate desire for love as adults comes from a need for healing of our past, so we are all drawn to something about our beloved that will heal an old wound or repair a loss from our childhood or adolescence. [My sister and I skyped about this last weekend!] So herein lies my question: Either we check our baggage at the door because in love there is no fear, and there is no need to carry the hurt anymore OR we come-a-load-bearing, knowing that real love will relieve us of the burden. Which is it? I need help!

Reason 2: I found this song today. Dela says that it is neither my tattoos, nor vintage clothing that first give me away as a Carrboro Hipster, but my awful taste in music. But Florence says everything I feel!
This is Florence + The Machine singing Shake it Out.

It sure is hard to dance with a devil on your back. I think that being able to let go of the past might be my biggest road block to happiness in the future. Funny that I am now building my life and career out of "digging up the past." My career is in "Ruins!" Haha, oh... I kill me. But seriously, it seems to be a real obsession of mine, but one that I think I might just be able to shake off. Perhaps I will next weekend in a little pagan earth dance around one of the megalithic stone circles I'm writing about? I'll let you know how it goes! But I'm ready to leave it all behind me. So if there are readers out there who feel as though I have held on to some hurt in my past or mistake in yours... forgive me?
[John taught me that last part is a question and not a statement]

Shake It Out

by Florence Welch

Regrets collect like old friends
Here to relive your darkest moments
I can see no way, I can see no way
And all of the ghouls come out to play

And every demon wants his pound of flesh
But I like to keep some things to myself
I like to keep my issues strong
It's always darkest before the dawn

And I've been a fool and I've been blind
I can never leave the past behind
I can see no way, I can see no way
I'm always dragging that horse around

And our love is pastured such a mournful sound
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground
So I like to keep my issues strong
But it's always darkest before the dawn

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaaah

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

I am done with my graceless heart
So tonight I'm gonna cut it out and then restart
Cause I like to keep my issues strong

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

And given half the chance would I take any of it back?
It's a fine romance but it's left me so empty
It's always darkest before the dawn

And I'm damned if I do and I'm damned if I don't
So here's to drinks in the dark at the end of my rope

And I'm ready to suffer and I'm ready to hope
It's a shot in the dark and right at my throat
Cause looking for heaven, for the devil in me
Looking for heaven, for the devil in me

Well what the hell, I'm gonna let it happen to me

Postcards to those who find TWO of the allusions in the text. Why isn't anyone competing for postcards anymore?!

* I recommend this so HIGHLY for anyone in a relationship--marriage or dating! I've already plugged it to friends and family. Great Read!

quelqu'un comme toi.

It's week 5 and Candace just took a midterm, which means it's now halfway through the semester. My mother's impending visit marks a shift in the cosmos, as I will shift into high gear in order to masterfully execute two portfolios the week after her departure. Following that, I'll be doing some independent site surveying, writing a 7500 word term paper, and a 3000 word essay. All this while keeping up on the "latest" in prehistoric rock art trends &  hammering out (pun intended) my thesis proposal so I can...visit the States in mid November. Needless to say, though it's work I love doing, Busy. Autumn. Ahead. I know this sounds insane, but I'll also be taking on some part time work so that I can afford said trip home, not to mention....a little holiday treat of my own :)

I have no class from November 29th to January 16th, so mark your calendars and plan a visit! [But not the first week of December because Theresa is coming then and not the first week of January because Josh is coming then] To prevent any sort of Judy Garland/Jimmy Stewart induced Christmas sadness, I fully intend on drowning myself in the endlessly exquisite delights of the city featured below, while sporting a beautiful winter coat like Adele's $900 Moschino or This--the lights, the lust, the cathedrals, the cemetery, the Musee D'Orsay, my beloved moules au gratin, and the absinthe I always order & never finish-- I'd love to have someone to share it all with, but I'm finding my own lovely company to be quite enough in the quiet moments that have been so abundant lately.

As Always, Enjoy Adele.

 

                   "Parfois l'amour dure, mais parfois ça blesse plutôt"

Happy List Wednesday!

The following things made me happy today.
Lizzie's List

10. Candace. Look at her. She's precious and she rubbed my shoulder muscles this morning even though they feel like scary rocks-bone things. Aaand she's currently singing a "happy song."

9. Scrooging my change. (stacking coins)

8. My Dad. Never underestimate how lucky you are if you have two living parents 

who love you more than they love themselves. It's something to be so very thankful for.

7. My other Dad, our landlord Gerry, who always stays for tea and a 2 hour chat when he "calls."

6. Sending secret love texts to people in America who can't reply :)

5. My laundry being blown dry in the "crisp hibernian air." Just like I wrote in my poem.

4.  These girly archeologist hunter boots.

3.The Earl Grey that C and I are about to take with our tea biscuits like The Holy Communion.

2. Italian Vogue and its Voluptuous -with a capital V- models

1. MY NEW RED PANTS! --You can't see this, but there are zippers at the bottom!

Your happy list for a special prize! Go, Compete! Win my love!

Yep. Never gonna dry. Still makes me happy though.

You can't even tell this is on my counter.

No modeling in my future :(

She's like Christmas morning!

Your love is like tears from the stars (for Mama on her birthday) 10/4

"The Mother is everything — She is our consolation in sorrow, our
hope in misery, and our strength in weakness. She is the source of
love, mercy, sympathy, and forgiveness. The sun is the mother of the
Earth and gives it the nourishment of heat; it never leaves the universe
at night until it has put the Earth to sleep to the song of the sea
and the hymn of the birds and brooks. And this Earth is the mother of
the trees and flowers. It produces them, nurses them, and weans them.
The trees and flowers become kind mothers of their great fruits and
seeds. And the Mother, the prototype of all existence, is the Eternal
Spirit, full of beauty and love."

from Broken Wings by Kahlil Gibran
 

Happy Birthday Mom!  I love you so much, and can't wait to see you in a week! Your present is waiting for you in Ireland!

Everyone must be wearing heels except for me :( Typical.

Sorry, can't flip the video! If you're wondering where the familiar title of today's blog post comes from, check out Boyz II Men singing "A Song for Mama"

Anniversary Poem!

Happy two year anniversary to Candace and Matt!! (and thereby 2 year anti-versary to me) I toast this wonderful day (yes, I'm drinking) with a little Billy Collins, a favorite of mine, Candace's and Bill Clinton's. He read it just like this when I saw him in Brookline around this time 3 years ago--what an artist! I love this refreshing, realistic take on love. Let me know what you think!
Billy Collins reading Litany aloud


Litany by Billy Collins
You are the bread and the knife,
The crystal goblet and the wine...
-Jacques Crickillon

You are the bread and the knife,
the crystal goblet and the wine.
You are the dew on the morning grass
and the burning wheel of the sun.
You are the white apron of the baker,
and the marsh birds suddenly in flight.

However, you are not the wind in the orchard,
the plums on the counter,
or the house of cards.
And you are certainly not the pine-scented air.
There is just no way that you are the pine-scented air.

It is possible that you are the fish under the bridge,
maybe even the pigeon on the general's head,
but you are not even close
to being the field of cornflowers at dusk.

And a quick look in the mirror will show
that you are neither the boots in the corner
nor the boat asleep in its boathouse.

It might interest you to know,
speaking of the plentiful imagery of the world,
that I am the sound of rain on the roof.

I also happen to be the shooting star,
the evening paper blowing down an alley
and the basket of chestnuts on the kitchen table.

I am also the moon in the trees
and the blind woman's tea cup.
But don't worry, I'm not the bread and the knife.
You are still the bread and the knife.
You will always be the bread and the knife,
not to mention the crystal goblet and--somehow--the wine.

Music Video Saturday

So my plan today for walking around the city was thwarted by the first heavy rainfall since I've been here... So I'm reading my thesis advisor, Muiris O'Sullivan's, Megalithic Art in Ireland, a cool article on charcoal analysis at an Iron Age ritual site, and Deepak Chopra's  The Path to Love at my new favorite spot--the 2nd floor Starbucks on Grafton Street, overlooking Bewley's Cafe. I infamously listen to music while I read and  here's a snippet of what I'm listening to today...

Beyonce's voice is undeniably amazing, but there's something alluring about the Florence + The Machine version to me. Which do you like better?

Also, very different, but equally powerful versions of Run by, Leona Lewis  and Snow Patrol

This will always remind me of Jefferson because of how often 

I listened to it to calm myself after 8th period in Boston :)

Everyone knows that Jeff Buckley sings the best version of Hallelujah, 

but I like the ladies a bit more lately...

Ok, some European tourists who don't understand personal space just joined my tiny table with their lattes and little ones, so I'm done :) Want a postcard shipped on Monday with the rest? Post YOUR favorite song that's been covered and let me know which you think is best and why!

<3, e